Why Does Using Sex to Hook Men Not Work? And What to Do Instead.




Do you use sex as a bait to get men involved? Have you considered the downside of it?

Sex is just a temporary pleasure, and the adverse consequences go beyond what can just meet the eye.

When you are single and you keep getting emotionally and intimately involved with the opposite sex, you get yourself exposed to sexually transmitted diseases such as gonorrhoea, syphilis, herpes, etc and notably the dreaded 'Acquired Immune Deficiency Syndrome', AIDS. Millions of people across the World especially young people who are sexually more active, died out of this disease. Not to talk about a lot more who have been kept miserable over the years by these STDs.

Many young ladies surrendered themselves as sex machines in men's bedrooms because of their poverty mentality. A lot of them are not working. Some are so lazy they don't even want to work. You do not have money to meet your most basic needs. You cannot provide for yourselves something as cheap as the sanitary pads to manage your monthly menstrual cycles. As a result, you use sex to set trap for the men so you can be given money.

To remain fashion conscious and savvy, a lot of ladies sacrifice their bodies. Even though your incomes are meagre, you want to be up to date with fashion. You have a lot of boyfriends just because you need a lot of 'donors' to enable you continue living your fake life.

Why is this a problem?

In the course of those sexual escapades, a lot of young women have contracted unwanted pregnancies. When you conceive for a stranger, you are faced with two monsters. One, you go through abortion to terminate the pregnancy or two, you deliver the baby as a bastard. During the operation, mostly done by quacks, some women get their wombs damaged for life. And others dump their newborns in waste collection centres or bushes where they eventually cry to death or are picked up for the motherless babies' homes.

The Scripture says that the love of money is the root of all evils. Today, most men love money more than anything else. And they want easy money and so, they visit idols where they make all manner of sacrifices in order to get money. Women who easily fall for men become preys in the hands of those evil men.

Sex does not equate to love. When you submit to a man sexually, he'll use, abuse and dump you. That relationship eventually ends and you become the loser for it because you're going to feel disappointed, rejected, frustrated and abandoned.

On the other hand, when you exhibit good conduct and good character, you become the darling of your man. You command respect. You command honour. You command dignity. Your man cares for you and pays more attention to you and your needs. You'll be proposed to. You'll get married and experience the kind of relationships you had ever dreamt about together.

When I was still single and searching for my perfect life partner, I had a number of dates. What I discovered was that I had more respect and honour for those I had no carnal knowledge of. I cared more about them. I called them and texted them more often. I paid more attention to them and their well-being. But once I had sex with any, the love and the emotions began to dwindle. If it were someone I didn't quite like, I could easily ghost at that point because it looked like there was no other thing remaining to explore.

What do you do instead to attract the love of your life?

First, you need to set your boundaries. You need to set your deal breakers. Those are your standards which are your values that you cannot compromise. You politely, from the onset, let your partner know that sex, for example, is a 'no-go' area for you in the relationship. You need to maintain your integrity because that boundary is going to be tested. The guy would like to check if you meant it.

You have to be a woman of good character. You'll be polite, kind and considerate. Extend an olive branch to your partner and to all who come your way. Be authentic and be vulnerable! Openness is a great virtue.

Do not be self-centred. Think more of what you can do for him. Support him to achieve his goals insofar as you are invited. Offer advice or help only when he asks from you. Give him peace of mind and never try to change him.

They say an idle mind is the devil's workshop. By all means, get yourself engaged in meaningful activities. If you don't have a job, learn one skill or another that you're passionate about. You can also join any volunteer service you love in your locality. The idea is to keep busy and get engaged meaningfully.

Overall, if you kept your sanity and your virginity, you become irresistible to quality men. No man likes any woman who uses sex to set trap for him. Marriage is honourable and it is a sacred institution that you do not need to defile your body before the time is ripe.



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